28 November, 2011


I’m going to admit.

I had two pre-determined actions to the outcome of yesterday’s games.

One, for a loss ---

SHUTDOWN. There is NO WAY a supposedly “up and coming” team can lose to a 0-10 team with nothing to play for except MAYBE pride or a paycheck. It would have been an embarrassment from which this season, what’s left of it, could not have recovered. And I would have locked down the rant for the remainder of the season as well, unless the muse moved me. And the eyes of serious doubt would have been cast upon the Rivera regime from yesterday going forward.

I for one, am mighty glad I didn’t have to do it.

Two, for a victory –

Quiet acknowledgement. This is a team YOU ARE SUPPOSED to beat. The parts that we have expected to work well, did. Great. The parts we have accepted as sucking, did. Only The Carolina Panther defense could have allowed the Mighty Colts to notch one of their most productive offensive outputs of the season. But to Coach Chudz’ credit, he had a sound game plan offensively to absolutely leave no doubt of the outcome –

Pound the rock. When any football team can run the ball for 200 yards or more, you can pretty much expect victory. And against a significantly inferior opponent, you are virtually assured. Done. I’m pretty sure it was Woody Hayes of Suck-eyes fame that said –

“Three things happen when you throw the ball, and two of ‘ems BAD!”

So, an “up and coming” coaching staff did what they had to do to ensure victory, and a better season than last year. Again, great. Everyone’s happy.

We suck less. It’s a somewhat self-derisive chant I’ve taken to make on exiting the Pasture of Disasture in our all-too-frequent offseasons.

Less than….???

Certainly less than the team we just beat -

Definitely less than the Lambs, at 2-9-

Without AP, we suck less than the 2-9 Vikings, although they’ve beaten us this year –
Because of our excitement generating offense, we suck less than the 3-8 Dullfins and Jaggy-whyers –

There are 8 teams with 4-7 records just above us. Can you, with a straight face, tell me that the DeadSkins, Seadogs, Chefs, Chargers, Iggles, Browns, and Cardy-noles are significantly LOWER on the sucky-ness meter than US??? The Mighty Cam-a-lots? Make that argument to me! And this coming Sunday, we have a real opportunity TO PUT A TEAM IN OUR DIVISION IN LAST PLACE! Against a mightily struggling Sucky-neers team in Tampa, not only can we go on an honest-to-goodness winning streak, but we can DOUBLE our victory totals from our history-making monumental season of misery last year!

Our defense, of course, will be our ever-present albatross around our necks in that venture, but if we can keep moving the ball like we have, who knows? Tampa certainly doesn’t have a Calva-tron in that offense, so….

I don’t wanna get too pumped about this – After all, we just knocked around that little snot-nosed kid, and just barely got him on the ground, but we gotta start somewhere. Advancing in power positions is a very positive indicator of the direction of our team. The notion of sucking for a great draft pick is one that has forever been repugnant to me. I, like the professionals I pay dearly in real money to see and support,




Though not likely, an 8-8 finish would validate in the most convincing manner, the sky-high hopes we have for this team going forward into seasons to come. Hell, a 6-10finish would STILL guarantee high drafting position for the 7 rounds of Chef Rivera’s dash into the NFL Mega-Mart!

I end my rant with a heartfelt thanks to James, Tina and family for hosting the away-game watching party this week, and having some exciting NEW BUS CONVERSION planning! Yes, that’s right.

A new party bus for our new team….

That despite everything we seen that sucks this season, I’m still convinced will suck less, and one day,

Will not suck ----


See you Thursday with the picks.

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