27 September, 2011

DELIGHTFUL DELUGE

I had mixed feelings going into last Sunday’s game – part of me was wondering if we’d set the bar too high after two stellar performances by our new Newton – the other part was full of Panther Potion and buzzing with the party afterglow and confidence that we’d stomp the Jaggy-whyers into the Pasture of Disasture. I knew Maurice Jones-Drew was going to be a load. I had serious doubts about our defense’s ability to stop him –

What I didn’t expect, not in the least, was a downpour that could have driven any of us to pickup truckloads of gopherwood and download plans for a massive flotation device that could hold our families and two of every animal in the Piedmont. The defense had already surprised, with a safety, and some turnovers. And Cam surprised, too. I knew he’d toss a stinker sometime, I just didn’t expect him to start doin’ it in Game 3. Ok, it wasn’t quite that bad, but I’m tellin’ you, if he sails balls like he did in the first half last Sunday against a REALLY good defense, he’s gettin’ picked. No doubt. So the sky decided to dump a body of water the size of Lake Wylie onto the stadium, and most of the attendees headed for the concourse. Hell, not me, not The Wildman – not most of you, my PantherFanz readers! Football doesn’t stop for rain, snow, sleet or dark of night, and so with the most loyal of fans, we remain in our seats.

And you know what –

It was FUN!!!

Getting drenched in that warm rain, watching the players do their best to maintain their footing and their hold of the ball was a rarefied experience EVERY football fan needs to experience. Never mind that DelRio managed to get Stewie’s drive to the endzone reversed! Yeah, yeah, I know I was abuzz with Panther Potion, but I REALLY didn’t mind the rain – my mind goes back to my courtin’ days – did any of you ever get caught in the rain with your sweetie, and finally sayin’ screw it, let’s enjoy it instead of running for cover? How exciting was it getting a loving smooch in the deluge? Or something better? There’s something fundamentally romantic and enjoyable about the rain. You know, rain grows the corn, and corn makes the whiskey, and … oh whatever.

I’m going to be honest with y’all. Seeing that baseball score at halftime didn’t bother me. Did any of you think for a moment it was game over? I didn’t think so. I KNEW that we had something else for these Jaggywhyers, and sure enough, the defense and the Cam-a-lots did not disappoint, and we go home happy and decidedly damp after our first victory. I knew this – I was RIGHT about MJD. He definitely got his yards. I was SHOCKED at the continued lack of production on the ground. Yes, between Stewie and Deangelo, we notched a benny on the ground, but that ain’t gonna cut it, fanz. I DID make a comment at the end of the lockout two months ago – without the OTA’s and the necessary time required to learn the mechanizations of the coaches’ plan, we really wouldn’t see the REAL NFL teams until Week 8. Perhaps we will see the return of our beloved SteWilliams by then. And oh, what a complement to Sir Cam-a-Lot that will be!

And speaking of Newton, did you really think that he could keep up the pace of the past two weeks?
I think of something I’m pretty good at – I’m known as a fairly decent airbrush virtuoso. I don’t normally turn the air pressure up when I’m doing my best work – I’m usually working at 18PSI or lower – It doesn’t take a blast of power to knock a piece out of the park for me – And on this day, Cam didn’t need to fling the biscuit all over the field – all he needed was to get it close to the promised land. Believe it or not, I think Chudz called this on purpose, given the conditions, the team we were playing, and what the defense was giving us. Folks, I’d rather win 16 games scoring 16 points or less, than losing every week and scoring 30.


In the meantime, let’s all dry off, enjoy the victory, enjoy the growing process, and let’s get fired up about the weekend’s visit to Chi-Town and a humbling of an overrated defensive lineman from North Cacka-lacky…

That’s what I got tonight folks. I’ll be back Sattiday with the picks…

Gotta comment?
Email me –
The Cedar Street Seer
CaptnTee@aol.com

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