PARTY IN THE LOT- BY A FIELD GOAL!

December 28, 2008

It almost felt like a pre-arranged agreement between the two NFC South opponents. One, with a DOMININANT running game, and a complimentary passing game with an all-world wide receiver, and the other with a passing game that could whoop the Klingon Empire All-Stars, but with a defense that couldn’t stop a bucket of Tribbles. And the star QB needed enough yards to beat the record of a Hall-of Famer. At first, it appeared that arrangement was put on hold, but once Foxy felt that 20 points was enough, he’d have Turkey-Vac pull in the leash of that “deadly” pass rush “koff-koff” and give o’l Brees enough yards to down Danny-Boy’s single season passing record. BUT-

Someone forgot to tell Foxy that they MIGHT try to win the damn thing!

Ok, I know most of you don’t believe that horse-hockey. I don’t either. But from a certain vantage point, it sure SEEMED that way! But THIS edition of the Carolina Panthers has been impervious to the opponent’s rally. In almost every game, all year. Mini-Soda had the lead early in the second half. Tampa had us from kickoff. The Duckies as well. And but for karma’s capricious breath at the end of the Giants game, we could add them to the rally-buster tally. When Brees found his boy Lance Moore in the end zone for the tying score with mere minutes left, I felt a little anxious, but the strength of the ’08 Panthers was about to take the field.

That’s right. THE OFFENSE.

And right on cue, y’all saw what happened. And as befitting the sole remaining Original Panther, John Kasay made his FIRST game winning kick of the year. That’s right. His FIRST of the year! Look it up if you don’t believe me. He hasn’t had to do that ONCE this season. That’s very telling about this year’s team. There’s no question in my mind that this collection of athletes wearing the Panther silver, blue and black with enough time at the end of the game, can always put themselves in position to win. ESPECIALLY if that cagey Cajun wearing #17 is moving these fellas down the field. And that “little” dude wearing #89 is there to catch those Tommy-John enhanced missiles. Don’t forget, there’s that mercurial #87 there, too, who was CLUTCH today.

But there’s a glaring weakness on this team, and it prevents full Fox-Ball from being played, and now, there’s no fixing it. You know what I’m gettin’ ready to say, so I’m not going to belabor the point. Our defense is NOT Super Bowl caliber. Our offense IS. So, Wildman has his mint condition ’68 Chevelle washed, waxed, gassed up and ready to take Sweetie to the holiday ball – BUT – The heater’s on the blink, and Sweetie will have to bundle up on the way to the big dance. Not to mention Wildman. But he wouldn’t think of havin’ to set Sweetie in that beat-up pickup of his, so he’s got to run wut he brung. As it goes with Fox and this team. Even with the two weeks rest, this defense at BEST is good enough only to blunt a strong offensive attack. It is what it is, friends. Only draft and free agency next year is helping this unit. So whaddya do, Foxy? Huh? Huh? Huh?

You may have thought of this, Foxy, but USE YOUR OFFENSE AS YOUR DEFENSE! We’ve got the massive line, the blocking receivers and tight ends, the ballsy QB and the powerful SteWilliams. If we’re gashing the Duckies/Fleeguls/Cardy-Noles/Vikings for time-gobbling drives of 6,7,8 minutes, we’re giving the defense time to rest, and keeping the offense from finding a rhythm. And there is NO QB on the playoff rolls in the conference that is equal to Drew Brees, and that INCLUDES Kurt Warner. NO ONE, and that includes the mighty GEEEEEMen, has been able to stop Stewilliams OR Moose and Squirr- uh, Smitty. As long as Jake doesn’t turn the ball over, this is a very distinct game plan with a great chance of success. And history has shown that THIS is Jake’s time. He’ll deliver, for sure. And, here’s the big part-

We’re at HOME.

Where we’re 8-0, and the budding 12th man is learning how to cheer for this team. Whos’ teams fans are coming en-masse to our house come January 10th? See that list from the last paragraph to get an ideer. That’s right. The stadium should be FULL of noisy Panther fans for yet another terrific night game.

And the lucky few there will have lubricated themselves in the Cedar Street Lot where Bus Master James has parked the mighty Panther Party Prowler, and Head Coach Dano has fired up the legendary “JoKer Smoker”, and the rest of you lovable PantherFanz have joined us for a cherished playoff tailgate party.

We got two weeks to salivate, anticipate, and dream!

Captain Foxy’s left the scattered debris of the NFC South dreadnoughts to float in the space of the regular season, now consigned to the history books. Defensive Engineer Turkey-Vac tinkers with the shields, but he’s got some time, as the XO Davidson has the phaser banks at full strength, and the maxium compliment of photon torpedos ready to fire!

The Super Bowl awaits, Fanz! Engage the Panther Drive!

Stay tuned, I’ll be back later in the week with the first playoff handicap-

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E-mail me, The Cedar Street Seer (who went 8 correct out of 12 for the playoff teams, and 12-4 for the final week of handicapping!)

CaptnTee@aol.com