THE CEDAR STREET SEER'S QUARTERLY REPORT - QUARTER 3

Good Saturday night to you all, Fanz!

A brutal stretch of days at the day job has gotten me to the keyboard on Saturdays only, and for brief stretches only. But I made a committment to keep blogging for the site, and I am VERY passionate about the league, even though the Panthers are quite the dissappointment this year. So, with four games left to go, there's plenty to figger out, but some playoff certainties.

Here's the big picture.

AFC DIVISION LEADERS

INDIANAPOLIS (12-0) CINCINATTI (9-3) SAN DIEGO (9-3) NEW ENGLANDLAND (7-5)

Of these four, The Colts have clinched. Another pair of wins probably guarantees a first-round bye and home field. The Bungles are win away from clinching the Norris Division, but San Diego all of a sudden has a resurgent Denver team a game behind. The Chargers have challenging games against the Cowbabies and Bungles, so you can't print playoff tickets yet. And stumbling New Englandland all of a sudden has to check it's six for the Dolphins and Jets - I have a feeling the Pastry-rots will have to fight till Week 16 for the East Division.


AFC WILD CARD HOPEFULS

DENVER (8-4) JACKSONVILLE (7-5) MIAMI (6-6) NY JETS (6-6) BALTY-MOORE (6-6) PISSBURGH (6-7)

The Broncoids have a good chance to make it if they can split their last two games, which could be CrOakland and KC. The other two are Indy and Philty away. Rotzaruck with that. Same deal with Jacksonville. Miami has a more favorable schedule than the Jets, but one of those HUGE pivital games is against the Jaggy-whyers. The dark horse here is the Ravens, who have a very doable final four against the Leos, Da Bears, Pissburgh and CrOakland. If you can, tuning into the Quothers for the remainder of the regular season could be quithe entertaining. And while the Squeelers could theoretically win their last three to go 9-7, so many tie breakers work AGAINST them, that really, math is their only ally right now. And this team, after losing to three of the league's bottom feeders in succession, is done.


AFC ON LIFE SUPPORT

TENNESSEE (5-7) HOUSTON (5-7) BUFFALO (4-8) CrOAKLAND (4-8)

Math keeps these guys in the picture, but really, the draft is in future of these guys, and not much else beyond spoiler.

AFC CASEY CLAUSSEN SWEEPSTAKES

KANSAS CITY (3-9) CLEVELANDLAND (2-11)

The Chefs have Matt Cassel. The Brownies have, uh, yeah, they want the Domer. They've got a shot, as their big game was played two nights ago.



NFC DIVISION LEADERS

NEW ORLEANS (12-0) MINI-SODA (10-2) DALLAS (8-4) ARID-ZONA (8-4)

The Saints have won their division, and will likely be playing in the Superdome for their first shot at the Super Bowl. They are truly the NFC's version of the '07 Pastry-rots. Unstoppable offensively, and good enough on defense to outscore ANYONE. Seeing them go undefeated will be the story of the rest of the season. And the Favres have FINALLY started to wear out! See! Just like I told you. Watch what happens when the Bungles roll in and tattoo the old man. The Cowpuppies are in a death match with the GEEEEEEEmen and Fleeeguls and December. Look out, Jerry. And unless Samauri's boys mount a rally, the Cardy-noles should be set for a second consecutive division title.


NFC WILD CARD HOPEFULS

PHILTHYDELPHIA (8-4) GREEN BAY (8-4) NEW YORK GEEEEEMEN (7-5) ATLANTA (6-6)

In this contest, the G'ints and Iggles will knock one of the other out of the chase. Things will get quite interesting if the GeeMen prevail this Sunday night. And the Packers are in great shape right now, because the schedule favours an 11-5 finish. Theoretically, the Duckies could go 10-6 and challenge, but they are far too depleted to mount a serious challenge. They will fade and only have second place in the Saints-dominated South to fight for, because the Panthers are a game behind.

NFC ON MATH SUPPORT

CHICAGO (5-7) CAROLINA (5-7) SAN FRANCISCO (5-7) SEATTLE (5-7)

During the Bo Jackson heydey, a cool Nike commercial had Bo doing all kinds of things with the stars of the day, who would say "Bo knows golf! Racing! Tennis! etc..

And during the hockey segment, Gretzky skated up and simply said -

uhhhh------


NO.

Not even spoiler.


NFC CASEY CLAUSSEN SWEEPSTAKES

WARSHINGTOON (3-9) DETROIT (2-9) TAMPA BAY (1-11) SAD LOUIS (1-11)

A dismal end to the season awaits this quartet. Josh Freeman had better spruce up his resume. Either the Suckaneers or Lambs are gonna make a big play for Chuckie Weiss' former pet QB.


So that's my view of the league at the home stretch - So how does the CSS see it coming down?

In the AFC, of course, the Colts get home field, but I think MIAMI, yes, the DOLPHINS overtake the Pastry-rots who COULD collapse at home against Carolina, and it's a forgone conclusion that the Bungles could NOT POSSIBLY bungle up their stranglehold on the division. I think the Chargers take the West, and the Broncoids snag one of the wild cards, and the Jaggy-whyers take the other spot. An Indy-Cincy championship game sounds great, but come on, you know the Colts are coming out of this conference.

In the NFC, the Saints are annointed with the Dome Field Advantage, and PHILTHY, YES, the IGGLES, win the division. The Favres, by virtue of their sweep of the former Favres, win the Norris, and Arid-Zona takes the division this weekend. And the Cowpuppies FINALLY get off the playoff schinde and get a wild card spot, as do the terrific Packers. Aaron Rogers will do what he can against the Saints, but the Black and Gold prevail, and all kinds of "Princess and the Frog" tie ins make the made-for Disney Saints story a kitschky back up for


SUPER BOWL XLIV whose winner I would not even begin to predict, only that it could go down as the highest scoring contest since Jake Delhomme got into a throwin' contest with Tommy Terrific.

Thank you so much, fanz, for continuing to read my drivel, and thanks so much, Lauren, for the great anniversary gifts of super-sized wine goblets that hold a half-bottle of wine that made a nice buzz with the quartely report. Another goblet accompanies me for the weekly handicap! Stay tuned!

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