30 December, 2013


The seemingly long drive home after yesterday’s victory on the Duckie Pond, at first, found me jubilant, and then, quickly mired in a sea of emotion, none of it good. We listened to ESPN Radio’s Football Sunday broadcast, and all seven CRITICAL afternoon games were covered on the air “Red Zone” style – Packers triumphant over Bears. Niners surviving a late charge from the Cardy-Noles. Saints PUMMELLING the Sucky-neers, as expected. Seahawks dispatching the Lambs, thereby snuffing the hoped-for #1 seed. And – the Chef’s BACKUPS taking a DESPARATE Chargers team to overtime – mostly NFC teams that discovered their UnderDog Super-Energy Pills, that would watch film on our Keystone-Cops like offensive performance and begin licking their chops.

I struggled with what I’d write about, and the title – Yes, we “FINISHED” as I implored our Cats to do, but I was APPALLED at how FLAT our offense was! At a time where it was never more important to make a play, our supposed #2 receiver that NEEDED to step up – blanked. Couldn’t catch a F**KING cold! And, despite Dominik Hixon’s heroics of last week, we can see why he’s nothing more than a bit role player.

And I, just like everyone else who paid rapt attention to this game, realized just what STEVE SMMMMMMMMMMMMIFFF means to this team. Time has robbed him of some of his speed, but not his fire, not his passion, not his drive, and has done nothing but ENHANCE his leadership position on this team, a place that no one short of Jordan Gross can approach. One of these years, Luke will take that role, but right now, #89 drives this team. I thought of titling this rant “OFFENSIVE OFFENSE”, for the meager yardage (for US) gained on a TRULY SHITTY DUCKIES DEFENSE, was, well –

Offensive.  AND – in a game with such high stakes.

And then – I could not forget what ELSE we saw –

N  I  N  E 

S  A  C  K  S.

When, in this age of Super Bowls and the vertical passing game, has a team collected NINE SACKS???

I’m tempted to peruse the records of the ’85 Bears and see if they matched that feat –

And four of those sacks were collected by the ONE player on defense whose star has now begun to share the exclusive domain of Luke Keuchley and Thomas Davis – which led me to another thought, which was to subtitle the derisive editorial of our “O” with “DEFINING DEFENSE”. And for sure, when the story of the 2013 Panthers will be told, it will be the defense that will headline it. Cam Newton, that gorgeous hunk of quarterback that scintillates at least three times a game, might be the easiest on the eyes, and sexier to write about, but it’s this defense that’s carried this team this season.  Those of you who read this rant know I’ve been YEARNING for a madman on defense like Kevin Greene, a madman who can change the course of a game with a single play. I once thought earlier this season that Luke Keuchley could be that man – but he doesn’t have the character. The White Mike Singletary, yes, but NOT Kevin Greene.  And then I realized –

Greg Hardy is that madman.

MORE than MAD –


Who, in the history of the modern NFL broadcast, introduces himself as a mythical sea beast, and lists his education as JK Rowling’s iconic cotillion of higher super-natural education?

The Kraken, Class of Slytherin, Hogwarts, that’s who.

And he’s a free agent next season.




Dave Gettleman, DO NOT let this franchise cornerstone walk like Hurney let Peppers walk! What a heart-breaking prospect for the upcoming offseason, to have the closest thing to Kevin Greene leave for another team!!! You owe it to the continued success of this team to secure The Kraken’s services for the next few years – The producers of breakfast foods are DEPENDING on you!


For the future of Panther NATION –

PAY   THE   MAN  !  !  !

More on the game and the victory in the next few hours…

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