17 November, 2011

SUPERLATIVES

Here's the Wikkipaedia definition -

In grammar, the superlative is the form of an adjective (or adverb) that indicates that the person or thing (or action) modified has the quality of the adjective (or adverb) to a degree greater than that of anything it is being compared to in a given context. English superlatives are typically formed with the suffix -est (e.g. healthiest, weakest) or the word most (most recent, most interesting).

I struggled to find the right word to summon my feelings for last week’s abortion of a game.

I didn’t want to use an ordinary malodorous adjective – SUPERLATIVE seemed to fit my sensibilities.

Using the definition above, we can apply this to the Panthers –

The WORST special teams in the league.

The WORST run defense, possibly the WORST overall defense in the league.

The WORST possible result of bye-week production and preparation possible.

Possibly (in my opinion) the hokiest, over-produced pre-game activity I’ve seen to date, and much apologies to our veterans...

The UNFAIREST use of pyrotechnics in player introductions – EVER. Where was the smoke and fire for everyone else (not that they deserved it, after the fact…)???

The WORST game I’ve ever taken my pops to –

The WORST game we’ve had since, uh, LAST YEAR, opening up some serious malicious karma.

The WORST waste of ticket money we’ve had since, uh, LAST YEAR.


And it also applies to PantherFanz –


The BEST tailgate party, bar none.

The COOLEST Tailgate vehicle, bar none.

The BEST guests, (Joe Cahn, CatMan, Danny Morrison, Top Cats, Sir Purr VIP Tour, Canadian PantherFanz, Ravens Nest 1, The Owner, The FANBULANCE, shall I go on?)

The TASTIEST tailgate food –

The MOST scrumptious desserts – Pea Dad…

The MOST wasted I've ever seen BLu...

The MOST POTENT of tailgate elixirs – Panther Potion

The MOST CONVINCING of reasons to renew your tickets, year after year.

And, at this point, my throbbing left forearm will not let me continue. I’ve got a reason to underperform this week.


Carolina Panthers -----




Where’s YOURS!!!???


I’m out.

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E-mail me, The Cedar Street Seer
CaptnTee@aol.com

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